I sang a Point of Grace song in church this past winter called “Heal the Wound”. From the first moment that I heard it, the song resonated with me and it still does today. I love the way that Christian music can do that for me. Sometimes it seems the writers of these beautiful pieces have a way of explaining exactly how I feel in a much better way than I ever could….
“I used to wish that I could rewrite history
I used to dream that each mistake could be erased
That I could just pretend
I never knew the me back then”
How many times have I wished that I could change something in my past? Begged God to take it away, usually so that I didn’t have to deal with the way I felt about myself because of it….
“I used to pray that you would take this shame away
Hide all the evidence of who I’ve been
But it’s the memory of, the place you’ve brought me from
That keeps me on my knees
And even though I’m free”
Shame….I could easily admit if I was ashamed of someone else’s behavior – but it has been much harder for me to deal with my own shame of myself. Realizing that I do have a part to play in every argument/problem I am involved in. Knowing that I have refused to take responsibility for so long for my actions….Oh hide that evidence Lord…but if you did would I have a reason to run to You? To beg for Your mercy and to seek reprieve in You?
“Heal the wound but leave the scars
A reminder of how merciful you are
I am broken, torn apart
Take the pieces of this heart
Heal the would but leave the scars”
That chorus part is my favorite…heal the wound but leave the scars, a reminder of how merciful You are. If I didn’t have the reminders of my past – would I learn from them, would I see the One who has rescued me? Would I be grateful for where I am now because of where I have come from?
“I have not lived a life that boasts of anything
And I don’t take pride in what I bring
But I’ll build an alter with
The rubble that you found me in
And every stone will sing
Of what you can redeem”
When we are finally ready to let God do for us what we have tried to do for ourselves for so long our lives are often already a pile of rubble. But He redeems us, picks us up and helps us to rebuild our lives so that we can be a living reminder of what He can do. My heart sings with praises for the gifts You have given me!
“Don’t let me forget
Everything you’ve done for me
Don’t let me forget
There’s beauty in the suffering”
I would not have believed that beauty could come out of suffering, that I would be grateful for the journey because I could see everything that God has done throughout it to create beauty in my life. My eyes have been opened to the truth and I am grateful.